Do you know people who react incredibly calm in emergency situations? People who do everything right and get their best performance without any nervousness? This ability is not inborn. We can train that, and we should train it, not only because we all also get into stressful situations at times. But because we need to acknowledge and affirm: “I can do it. I’m really good when it matters.” But in order to do so, we need a Training Script.
Download Podcast (MP3 Audiobook): 3 Training Script – Mental Strength Training
Those who do not have this knowledge avoid challenging situations AND as a result, such a person is constantly on the run. She is consequently living far below her possibilities.
She doesn’t want to fail. It doesn’t want the pressure of challenging moments. But she who pulls her protective walls too high will no longer see the light. Fear rules in the life of such a person.
Even financial freedom would be a burden for these people. Because where fear rules, even wealth becomes a threat and a burden. Wealth and abundance are wonderful things. They make everything so much easier. It gives so much joy. But only for the mentally strong. A weak woman suffers from money, wealth and abundance. She suffers from everything.
Questions that don’t bother a strong person, but torture a weak one: “What if I make the wrong decision? What if I lose money? ”
As a rule:
We can only really enjoy all the joys of life if we are mentally strong. That even applies to a dream partner. If he is really that great, but we have no confidence, then even this partner becomes a constant source of fear: “What if he suddenly realizes how unattractive I am?” You see: We can only enjoy our dreams permanently when we’re mentally strong.
If, on the other hand, we are weak, we will simply write off certain dreams. Because we would not even attempt to live them. Because we would intuitively understand, that these dreams would be more of a burden in reality. This is one of the main reasons why so many people stop dreaming. Dreams don’t bring them happiness, but fears!
So we have no choice. We have to get stronger, mentally stronger. Otherwise, the desired financial freedom, wealth, and abundance will bring us everything, but no luck. In the last part, I said that we need a strong competitive behavior. Because, those who got that know, that they will always find a solution.
And the most important quality for our competitive behavior is the ability to act well. But what role should we play? And how can we learn to act better? We’re thinking about it today.
The Training Script
Do you remember what we said about competitive behavior? It is about being able to push our real behavior aside and activate our competitive behavior at any time. To do this, we need to know the script we are supposed to play on. We have to specify in detail what our body language and facial expressions should look like. How we need to behave, how we speak, how we have to present ourselves.
There are more competitive situations than you might think. For example in court – you remember the last part. Every good lawyer knows that we have to be an actor in the courtroom. By the way, a really good lawyer will discuss your behavior with you before going to your date at court. If your lawyer doesn’t do that, then he missed the most important thing.
We need to be good actors to implement competitive behavior.
- First, we need to understand that this is necessary and correct.
- Secondly, we also need a good script: A precise plan of how our competitive behavior should look and how we should behave.
- And thirdly, we have to train that.
Our actual emotions should not get out of hand. If you don’t have an exact script, you live by chance, based on your daily condition. This is a very dangerous procedure for critical situations. Because we want to be masters of our lives. We can never influence everything, but we can decide how we act, what we think, and what we feel. At least we can practice that. We can practice being almost always a good actor.
Emotions can be compared with muscles. Those ones we stimulate most often develop the best. So that we can best rely on them.
With our movements and facial expressions, we can influence our emotions. It's not by accident, that it's called E-motion, from the Latin word "emovere" which means "for moving out". So it's about the movements of our facial and body muscles. With them, we can create feelings of sadness, but also of happiness. Of depression, but also of certainty of victory, of pessimism, but also of optimism. Of fear, but also of luck. From low self-confidence, but also from high self-confidence. Of fear, but also of serenity. By the way, serenity can be the most graceful form of self-confidence.
We have to train to create the emotions within us, that is good for us, and even help others. And which, as we will see later, help us to quickly switch off and calm down afterward. Just like good actors who can actually call up these emotions, so they really feel in that way. And then they leave their role to return to their real behavior in their leisure time. Again, that's why the acting profession is so difficult. And that's why it is paid so well.
If you refuse to learn to act or just don't want to bother, you have no alternative for your life. You only have your real behavior available. Even in tough competitions in life, you have only your standard script. I think that's a major disadvantage. Where should someone who only has her real behavior available, get back to when the danger is over? How does she want to rest? How does she want to switch off?
The Workout - Your Training Script
If we want to train our acting skills, there are three approaches:
- Our thinking,
- our behavior,
- and our feelings - mentally, physically, and emotionally.
We have to learn to think in a disciplined way. That means we can only use certain words and ideas during challenging situations. The best way to do this is to visualize the situation beforehand. Then we can easier find energetic words in those situations. If we are facing a difficult task, we can say, for example:
- "I love it."
- "I'll make it."
- "I do not give up."
- "Today is my best day."
- "As a professional, I can always perform optimally, even if I don't feel like it."
You guessed it:
It takes practice. Incantations or affirmations are effective tools to implement such beneficial believes in our subconscious mind.
And now we link to the former parts of this training program. It is best not to start training in competition. And not just shortly before the competition. But, we can do it with our power questions in the morning:
- "Why is today an opportunity?
- What am I grateful for?
- What did I do well?”
The better we cope on normal days, the easier it is for us to act optimally under difficult conditions.
We have to consciously control our physical behavior, and our emotions are more controllable than most people think. There are two main ways we can control our emotions, our thinking, and our physical behavior.
Maybe you were sad, and suddenly someone needed your help. You literally forgot to be sad. Because your thinking got changed because your focus has shifted.
Maybe you were sad another time and then decided to do sports. Afterward, you definitely felt much better. The sport requires certain movements. And other motions lead to other emotions.
Our facial expressions and our body language determine our emotional reactions as well as our thinking. Not everyone can believe that, but most likely you can agree to the following: Our feelings are supported by our facial expressions and our body language. However, if these feelings are not helpful at the moment, then we have to adopt a different body language and a different facial expression. Otherwise, we are reinforcing a condition that is not beneficial for us.
We can train determined behavior. This is not inborn. We can learn to get up at crucial moments and adopt a confident body language, literally by getting up from a chair. Standing upright can increase your own confidence! It is not for nothing that many professional speakers speak while standing.
So we can train a “mask” of joy, self-confidence, and serenity. All of this brings us closer to the desired emotional state of being able not to judge the current situation and take it as it is. And in return, that affects the environment. Our opponents notice this, although not necessarily consciously. In any case, it will impress them. Just as others would feel superior when they see us collapse.
Our body language should bring us closer to the desired emotional state. Our body should convey the message: I love this challenge. We should never look at weakness or despondency. And certainly not fear. But let me remind you: This is not about tips for your real behavior, but only for competitive behavior! Those who act permanently burn out, get depressed. Just think of actors or musicians who committed suicide, such as Robby Willams or Michael Jackson.
We can also train our emotional reactions directly. We don't even have to take a detour through thinking and body language. Our spontaneous, emotional reaction is already helpful and therefore the correct one.
But this is a practiced habit. Every habit requires a lot of training. We will also talk about this in detail. It is certainly the most difficult way. But also the most direct.
Here is a first hint: If we train our thinking and physical behavior, we also indirectly train our spontaneous emotional reaction. Automatically.
Anyway, we have three starting points to be a good actor in crucial moments. We can train all three - and we should do it: our thinking, behavior, and feelings.
The Danger of Exaggeration
Of course, there is a danger with a very strong skill. If we slip into this too often or even permanently, i.e. play a role too often, then our real behavior could be neglected. If we simply spend too little time in our real selves, our most important needs may remain unfulfilled.
Therefore it is important that we clearly differentiate between our roles or differentiate the roles from our real behavior. If we play the role of competitive behavior, we want to achieve a certain goal in the short term. We use our acting skills to do this. But we need to know: At the same time, that a part of our real behavior is pushed into the background. This part remains unsatisfied, which can lead to becoming unhappy in the long run.
So, the right amount is important here. If we never or too rarely activate our competitive behavior, we probably won't get very far in life. We won't be able to develop and live out our real talents and skills.
On the other hand, if we are too strong and too often in our competitive behavior, this role dominates in our lives. Such people act as if they also play a role in their leisure time. They don't look real. Because they really are not. Such a situation can be very confusing for our psyche. A feeling of separation of real personality can occur. Values become unclear and orientation gets lost. This can be observed with many stars and politicians.
That is why it is important that we find a good level of balance. We can achieve this by strengthening both at the same time, our real behavior and our competitive behavior. We will talk about how to get a good balance in the next part of this training.
In order to achieve our best performance, we have to be able to activate our competitive behavior. And for that, we have to be good actors. We have to determine, what our winning role should look like. Then we can train to think accordingly, to behave accordingly, and to get automatically to a beneficial emotional reaction.
Your Thinking Time For Week 3
Your Training Script:
Do your thinking time in a mind storming manner. That means you write a list of ideas for each question. For 1 week, think every day about the following questions and find for each of them at least one new answer or an example. Write the answers down in your journal.
Now we have discussed in detail how you can train your competitive behavior. Please consider:
- How can you train your thinking?
- How can you train your physical strength?
- How can you train your emotional reactions?
I know that such tasks are complex. But it also shows to what extent you are ready to make real changes. This is only possible through training!
- Determine what are the decisive recurring situations in which you want to activate your competitive behavior. You come back again and again because you have chosen to do so. Like an athlete in competition.
- Think about what unplanned stressful situations might be awaiting you and how your competitive behavior will help you in such situations.
- What difficult situations have you already mastered with your activated competitive behavior in the past week?
- Write down five things you are grateful for.
On the 7th day of this week analyzing your results. What is the point which would give you the highest leverage? What action will you take, to making a little progress in that direction?
Vital and happy regards