Einstein said: "There is a genius in every child."
He means each one of us, you and me. Everyone has some unique strengths, and at least one special talent, that we should develop to its fullest.
The writer Sarah Ban Breathnach says, "Each of us is an artist ... With every choice we make, we create a unique piece of art. Something, no other human could produce."
We already talked about strengths in the last letter. That's so important. Please read or listen to the previous coaching letter about strengths again, before reading on.
Another important reason to identify and develop our strengths is: as long as we do not know our strengths, our fear of our weaknesses is greater than the confidence in our strengths. Instead of doing something fulfilling, we would only stuff the holes of our weaknesses. Those who lack the meaning of their life, often confirm that they spend their life by eradicating errors.
Parents are so concerned about the weaker grades of their children because they were conditioned as follows: the chain breaks at the weakest link. Which results in the belief, that it is necessary to reduce the weaknesses. This belief is wrong. Totally wrong!
Because if this would true, no rich man would be rich. Rich people are often very limited people. With one-sided strengths and many striking weaknesses. Others shake their heads about this and say: "Embarrassing weaknesses". But the rich men are rich because they did not work on their weaknesses. But instead, they focused on their strengths.
We need a new conditioning, a new belief: The way to produce peak income, fulfillment, and happiness,
Is to build up the strengths.
Here are some possible helpful beliefs:
Focus on strengths makes you rich;
Focus on weaknesses keeps you poor.
Focusing on strengths lets us see and use given opportunities;
Concentrating on weaknesses keeps us small in our self-constructed borders.
Focusing on strengths makes us free;
But focusing on weaknesses keeps us trapped in fear and insecurity.
Focusing on strengths makes us think positive, strong, and fulfills us with confidence;
Concentrating on weaknesses makes us think negative, weak and insecure.
Strengths and Weaknesses: How to do Strength Training
How do you develop your strengths? First, you have to recognize and train them clearly. Then look for a coach to get you in the lead. And in the meantime, train yourself to focus only on your strengths.
Ask in which situations, do you only consider and mention the strengths of others. Note the weaknesses, but do not mention them. If we look at weaknesses, it makes ourselves smaller. This refers to our own weaknesses and those of other people. We become pathetic blaspheming dwarfs. If we look at strengths, it makes us bigger. We become giants. Step by Step.
Why is that? In the next letter, we will talk about, why should we only look at our strengths in the case of big personalities, although many are too relieved to emphasize our weaknesses.
Let's just give a first general reason, why we grow when we look at the strengths of others - and shrink when we focus on the weaknesses. You know the reason: what we focus on will grow.
Concentration is power
When we look at our weaknesses, they become more relevant. In my case as a non-native English speaker, I could focus on my typos and grammar errors, when writing this. This would have destructed me from the content. That's why we should rather look at the solutions. So I concentrated on content, knowing that the orthography is not really good. The solution came to me almost by itself:
My friend Jenny offered me, to do the proofreading for me. Further, I saw an advertisement for a spellchecker plugin called Grammarly for the Chrome browser. I installed it, and it made the work for Jenny much easier. Approaching problems like this means focussing on the solutions, not on the problem. We should think about solutions to our weaknesses - because if we spend too much time with the weaknesses themselves, they gain more weight (and grow). They get too much meaning!
If we now look at the weaknesses of others, we tend not to find solutions to them. Most of them do that to show that even the big one is full of mistakes. According to the motto: "If I make all other buildings in the city flat, then mine is the highest ..."
My advice: just look at the strengths of others. You will like them more. The result will please you: you will see more of your own strengths as a result. You will learn to focus on what makes you grow. Think of the o.g. Possible beliefs: The more you pay attention to the strengths of others, the more likely (and stronger) you believe in those sentences become. The more you pay attention to the weaknesses, the more you reject these ideas.
Now we expand our consideration and also deal with our weaknesses. We ask ourselves what weaknesses are and for which we can find solutions and how these solutions can look like.
Strengthening strengths and finding solutions for weaknesses: The two topics are inseparable.
Those who focus on breaking down their weaknesses are wasting their lives. He will become at most average. Only those who concentrate on their strengths will be able to enjoy a full life. This applies to ourselves, but also to what we observe in others. We train to look at our own strengths as we get used to observing only the strengths in others. This habit is so important. It lets us grow enormously.
Many people are obsessed with their weaknesses. Their weaknesses seem like monsters lurking deep in their personality. Weaknesses are not monsters. They are valuable parts of our personality. Because they show us clearly where our way should not go. The guides to our life goal are our talents. The weaknesses characterize the areas that we should probably better avoid. Weaknesses can be important messengers.
But what is a weakness?
The lexicon says, "Weakness is an area where we lack the skills." If that were true, then each of us would have many weaknesses. Therefore, I consider it nonsensical to follow the definition of the lexicon. Another thing I like a lot better: A weakness is everything that prevents us from achieving our goals. Remember the third example in the last letter: I can not sing. Is that a weakness? No! Because I am able to reach my goals without being able to sing. I can easily ignore singing; it's just a strength I do not have - no weakness.
Weaknesses and Goals
But if one of your qualities prevents you from achieving your goals, you have to take them seriously. So the question is in terms of our supposed weaknesses: how relevant is this weakness for my goal? If a property is not relevant to my goal, it's not a weakness. It's just a strength I do not have. And why should I get upset about it? After all, I do not have many strengths. That's the way it is. But that's fine.
I only need one or a few strengths to become wealthy and happy
And we have basically not trained much more strengths well than well-educated ones. Think about what strengths are all there. In
- in the musical,
We recognize easily: There are thousands of possible strengths. Not having these cannot possibly be a weakness. That would be a definition of misfortune.
What should we do?
The key question is, what should we do with the weaknesses that keep us from achieving our goals? Of course, we should not ignore such weaknesses. Otherwise, we may be eaten by them. But we should very carefully consider whether a missing feature is really a weakness and whether we need to deal with it. And then we should choose one of the following ways of dealing with them:
We ignore everything that is just a supposed weakness (and actually only a strength we do not have). We are looking for a solution. And we choose a field of work in which this weakness does not matter. Then we turn the weakness into a strength. We need to know our goals and personality very well to choose the right method. This topic is extremely important to me. I've seen so many people live far below their potential ... and experience that every day. Very often there are the main reasons:
They pay too little attention to their strengths.
They fight all weaknesses immediately. Most of the supposed weaknesses are nonexistent. They are simply not relevant enough. Because they are often only messengers. And they show us quite clearly where we probably will not find our professional happiness. To think about how to deal with weaknesses, we need to know our goals. We should be aware of our strengths. We must always consider our weaknesses in the context of our goals. Otherwise, we do not know which of the o.g. Ways to deal with them, we should choose. Please reconsider your goals in writing before discussing options 2, 3 and 4 in detail in the next letter on this topic.
Strengths and Weaknesses To do:
- Train to appreciate other people only for their strengths. Only talk about their strengths. Do not blaspheme; do not scoff; Instead, appreciate only strengths. You do not have to pull anyone down - by ridicule, blasphemy and stress the weaknesses. You should pull yourself up on others - you always do that, if you emphasize their strengths!
- I repeat the to-do of the last letter: What strengths do you have?
- Who can you coach you?
- Make sure that you are disciplined and continuously develop your best talent. This one biggest talent is your rope ladder to heaven.
- Write down five achievements.